So much of the world’s population is depressed, you’d think we’d all have a clear understanding of it by now. One in four people in the UK are thought to struggle with their mental health.

But (stay with me here, I’m not being hyperbolic) depression isn’t like a regular illness, like the flu, it’s more of a complicated disease that we don’t fully understand, can’t yet totally cure, affects everyone differently and has different stages, and that can often be fatal. It’s more like cancer.

Just like cancer, the illness can be ‘beaten’ and bodies can be rid of it, but they’ll need regular checks to monitor a possible return. Just like cancer can happen to the healthiest of people and depression can happen to the funniest, a minor blip of strength is something that should be celebrated – of course – but doesn’t mean that the patient is ‘all better’.

Often the moments of strength are simply all a show for friends and family anyway, as we all tend to want to conceal our true pain from those we love.

But sometimes, sometimes the positive blips can be real, and believe me when I say they’re just as confusing for the patient as they are for the friends and family.

Personally I very much fall into the ‘this is all a fake song and dance for you’ gang, and there are very few things or occasions which actually make me feel some feelings.

However, the things that do are usually the most inconsequential and trivial (despite the amount of gravitas I award to Supermarket Sweep) that it’s easy to fall into the ‘ohmygodIamtotallybetternow!’ trap.

It always comes back, but it’s good to enjoy the light when it shines for a bit, and probably the best time for me to answer any questions about handling and managing my depression, if anyone were to have any I haven’t already tried to answer, as when I’m really down the last thing I want to do is talk about it.

Karen feels similar to this, telling Metro.co.uk: ‘When I’m in a good mood, I like to be asked about my general day (how is my work going? how was my yoga class? What books am I reading or Netflix shows I’m watching?). I find open questions much easier to answer and if I feel like mentioning my mental health I could do.

‘My close friends and family know that if I’m not going to the gym, reading something or working on a project then my mental health has taken a downward turn.

‘I find it difficult when someone directly asks ‘are you feeling better?’ as if depression is the same as a cold or tummy bug.

‘Some days I’m able to be mindful and in the present moment, which is when I’m in a comparatively good mood, but that doesn’t mean my depression is ‘over’ or ‘cured’, it just means I’m managing it well on that particular day.’

Melody tells us that she too prefers to talk about her illness when she’s feeling comparatively ‘good’, as it’s so difficult to talk about it when she’s down.

‘I’m happy to talk about my depression when I’m in a good mood, and sometimes it can help both me and people around me to understand how the feelings change for me, especially if I couldn’t explain it when I was at the bottom,’ she says.

Rosie says that she can ‘only really talk about depression when I’m in a comparably good mood. The thought fog, lethargy and empty feeling of depression make talking about much of anything seem absurdly complicated [when it’s feeling bad].

‘In a good mood, I like to try and get to the gym as much as possible to keep the good mood going and to almost “offset” those bad times when I can barely move. I do sometimes feel like a fraud though, as on my best days it would seem as though nothing is wrong with me.

‘I think the contrast between good days and bad days can be uncomfortable as best and extremely jarring at worst for people close to me.’

So, it seems to be a fairly common trait of depression that it’s easier to think about how you’re going to manage it when the fog has lifted a bit. But how would someone best approach The Great Depressed when they’re in a seemingly good mood, without bringing them back down again?

I say, just go for it. You don’t need to worry about ‘bringing someone back down’ because they’re there already, really.

Asking questions such as ‘how has your depression been feeling lately?’ or ‘how have you been finding your exercise/medication/therapy/walks/anything else someone is trying to do to help themselves?’ gives an opportunity for someone to talk it through if they want to, or to simply say that they’d rather not.

You’re not doing anything wrong by asking about it gently. Chances are, someone with depression will always have it with them in some form, but being supported by the people they care about is a huge, huge help.

The ‘good moods’ don’t mean depression has buggered off, but they might well be a more regular occurrence with the right kind of support.

If you or a loved one is struggling with mental health, you can find a qualified local counsellor in your area with Counselling Directory . Mental health charity Mind also offer counselling services, and you can call The Samaritans on 116123 (UK and ROI). If you can, visit your GP for further advice.

To talk about mental health in a private, judgement-free zone, join our Mentally Yours Facebook group.

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